Saturday, October 16, 2010

Scared.

I went to the doctors Thursday morning. Something isn't right, but I don't really know what. I'm tired all the time and lately, I feel like I won't make it through the day. I've been going to bed when Maura does. I'm exhausted. Last week I had a sinus infection, but that cleared up nicely after a few days on the antibiotics. So, my Dr. ordered some labs. A blood count, electrolytes, Lyme's, Mono, Lupus screening tests, thyroid tests, and a bunch of other stuff. Results should be ready by Monday. Before I left, I mentioned the pain on the left side of my upper chest that just won't go away. I thought I pulled a muscle. Apparently, there are a chain of lymph nodes that are swollen and very painful. There's also a few near my clavicle and one in my neck that are swollen. WTF. There are a few conditions that could make this happen. Lyme's and mono being two of them. Ok, good, already being tested for those.

Then she mentioned Lymphoma and Breast Cancer. Holy shit, what? I'm scared. So, I scheduled an appt to get a mammogram and an ultrasound of the left breast on Oct 27th. Ouch. My mom has had 2 tumors removed from her breasts, both benign. My grandmother had cancerous changes on her last mammogram, but she's over 80 and paralyzed on one side from a previous stroke, so there's nothing they can do. My great-grandmother died from metastatic breast cancer. I'm scared.

I'm not telling anyone, either. I just don't even want to talk about it. I'm freaking out as it is.

7 comments:

  1. No freak outs. We're in this together. xoxo

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  2. Aw, sweetie. I know how much living in a state of fear can wear on you, but I agree with Mrs. W. We are in this together. Lots of hugs, love and prayers for good news, and I hope you get some relief soon.

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  3. Oh sweetheart try not to worry. We are all in this together xoxo

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  4. ((Hugs)) I'm sure that's scary to hear. I was thinking it sounded a lot like mono before reading that was a possibility. Whatever it is we're here for you.

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  5. Hey there! I'm following your blog!
    Can you do the same for me?
    http://almcrock.blogspot.com
    Thanks so much! :)

    I'll be praying for you. God's got this.

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  6. Huge Hugs Toot. My money is on mono. Please keep us posted. Loves and Prayers for you Momma!

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  7. I'll be thinking of you! I agree that it sounds like mono. You poor thing.

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